Some women are very practised and can relieve you of all the fumbling about with the condom. But it does no harm to have the following guidelines under your belt:

1.    Only use condoms that are undamaged. So make sure there's a CE number or the EN 600 sign on the packing. And be careful how you treat condoms. They shouldn't be kept in conditions that are too hot (so not in the car's glove compartment in summer), shouldn't be crushed (better in your wallet than with your small change) and of course they shouldn't be damaged by sharp fingernails, teeth or sharp-edged jewellery or piercings.

2.    Take the condom out of its packet and place it on the tip of your erect penis. The rolled up ring should be on the outside, so that it can be rolled down over your dick.

3.    Squeeze the air out of the reservoir – that's the bubble on the end of the condom – which leaves enough room to take your sperm when you come.

4.    If you have a foreskin, pull it back now. Then slowly unroll the condom down the length of your penis towards your balls. Don't stretch it!

Firmly in place? Great. You're ready to go. But remember one thing: never allow greasy lubricants like Nivea© Creme or other cosmetics, massage oil or Vaseline to come in contact with the condom! Grease attacks the latex which means it can tear easily. But there are good grease-free gels available that are designed to be used with condoms.

And afterwards? After you've come? Hold the condom at the bottom, so that it doesn't slip off. Withdraw your penis from the woman while it's still stiff. It's best to get rid of the used condom in a waste bin. Toilets and sewage plants are easily blocked up.

By the way: Condomes can prevent unwanted fatherhood, too.